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Being a parent demands a lot of new things from you. There are no hard and fast rules or manuals. Every child is different and your child changes all the time. You have to adapt again and again in every stage of your child’s life. You want to be patient, empathize with your child and be able to control yourself. You want to set boundaries, but you also want to deviate from them. You want to protect your child and do it all right, because you wish your child the very best. That is quite something. It is therefore not surprising that you are sometimes insecure or that you sometimes find parenting difficult.

Possible causes

When you have a child, you sometimes get to know yourself very differently. Education is a kind of mirror. You learn which things are very important to you. Sometimes these are things that you inherited from your own childhood. These can also be frustrations, or even childhood traumas. A bad childhood can influence your role as mother or father. Sometimes you are shocked when you recognize your own parents in yourself. Or are you trying really hard to do it differently. That can sometimes make it difficult.

Talk about it

All parents sometimes feel insecure and anxious. These are feelings that parents share. It is important that you talk to other people about your feelings, thoughts, and difficult situations. You can use each other’s experiences and support each other. When parents do this, they often feel less lonely and stressful and they feel better able to handle parenting.

It can also help to make time for yourself, to relax and not worry. Sometimes you need this to recharge yourself and feel good.


Uncertainty is part of it, but if you notice that you or your child is not doing well, seek professional help and talk to the pediatrician or your GP.

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